so out of it

OH NOES

finally, i've told someone about it...
outlet to release...
and yes, i finally moved on deeper.

i want it. i really, really want it.
and every part of me leads to it in ways i cant explain.

but i can't take it... because i'm a coward.

i'm too afraid to face the consequence,
knowing that it'll come to haunt me for days after. and affect a lot of things.

it's bad enough as it is.

i dunno how much more i can resist.

it just seems so... and i cant help but just...

but i want it. i really do. so much.
and a part of me says i don't care how much will change.

sigh.

help. i didnt think it'd be this fast....