leaving lockers unlocked (sic)

GREENSLIP and "THAT OTHER FEELING"

That works as a tongue twister.

Ten times! Fast! Hehehe.

I am now impure. Stained. Unclean. (I want to use a certain word here, but it might not be appropriate. Hehehe. But I guess you know what my mind is thinking of. Right?)

What am I talking about? For the first time ever in my entire sixteen--almost seventeen--years of living to the like [insert more word related to first-time-ever here], I received a green slip.¹ Dundundun.

Even Mrs. Manongsong was surprised.

When she received it, she went like, "Meron na? Kanino toh? YOU!?!" And I was shocked as well... well, maybe not. (Why was I not shocked? See next part of this blog.)

Well. In my mind, I was going ARGH.

I was already ready to step into the spotlight and sing "Totally F*cked." I was having a sort of Melchior moment.² And I was thinking of writing a blog similar to anyon of his "rebellious" journals. Well, of course I'm making one... that's like DUH. Just not now.

Anyhow. Pleading does not work.

And I'm quite okay with it. I mean, Mr.S is nice. :D Well, I've been seeing him too often [see luis-is-now-secretary-so-he's-tasked-to-deal-with-the-reply-slips]. And he's a nice person. I don't really mind doing detention for the reason he stated. (If it were another teacher, maybe I would hold a grudge. *wink*)

Ack. This is a sad day.

I hope my parents took it well.

I mean, it's not like I was caught doing drugs or punching classmates, was I?

I just happened to have found myself [see title] accidentally.

^{1 - For people not from Xavier. A green slip = punishment = detention. I have an hour's worth btw.}

^{2 - For people who have no idea what I'm talking about or haven't been reading my blogs as much, I'm referring to Spring Awakening. Melchior is a "straight-a student who hates school"--to put it in simpler terms--who finds himself under school heat.}

Of course, my smileys are happy. Chill lang.

But not really.

Have you ever wanted to be struck by lightning? Jump off a building? [Insert related situations here]? Well, this morning, I did.

It's just one of those days, you know?

And NO. This is not related to the green slip.

I fell asleep in the school bus this morning (I have been bestowed upon the honor of the front seat. Thank you. Thank you.), and I woke up exactly when we arrived in school.

That's when I felt it.

What exactly is "it"?

You know, the feeling like you're dead. The feeling that you don't exist. The feeling like you're a walking zombie or something to that effect.

As Diana would put it, "Do you read obituaries and feel jealous of the dead? It's like living on a cliffside not knowing when you'll dive. Do you know? Do you know? What it's like to die alive?"3

It's like your soul's gone missing.

Creepy. I don't really remember how I got over it. I just did somehow.

Anyhow, that's the reason I had a more indifferent reaction to the first green slip of my life.

Well, I guess these things come in at just the right time, don't they?

3 - That's from the new musical Next to Normal. Diana has bipolar disorder. No, I do not have bipolar disorder.

Honestly, I have more to talk about.

It's just that (1) I can't remember, (2) the humidity is driving me crazy, and (3) I'm quite tired.

I like these superscript things. Hehe.