gluttony, varr, gluttony

The Week.

t*: 8.28: 3.19 BEWARE! Contagious: musicals...

Okay. What a reward. Hahaha. Anyhow.
QTs are finally over. Hayz. But this week has been such a big microwave. (wala nang maisip na pwedeng mai-compare. hehe.) Bakit kamo? Read na lang.

Warning. Mahaba toh. Hahaha!

.-.

Thursday morning was irritable.
Manong must have been asleep so he went past Madison imbis na kumanan. Stupidity. So we walked all the way from ICA to Xavier. Lapit na nga akong ma-late eh. Super pagod and frustrated na ako when I arrived sa classroom. GRR YOU!

The night before, I spent my evening waiting for papier mache to dry. Hayz. English portfolio. It still isn't dry. But oh well.

So yeah... that's most of my day. Hayz. Irritable.

.-.

So Friday night. I didn't open the computer. Totoo. In fact, since then, I haven't fully used the PC other than to check if it's working. Hahaha.

Bakit kamo? No... I'm not being a diligent student. Haha! Naaaliw na ako sa room ko. Hahaha! Halos natapos ko na ang pag-mo-move ng gamit. Damit na lang. Pramis. Hahaha.
So I studied in there. Haha! At the same time, I was listening to Hit. As usual. Homerun and BrewRats. Hahaha.

So yeah. I actually slept early. Woah! Hahaha. I'm surprised, too. Hindi pa nga nakauwi dad ko'eh. Hahaha.

.-.

Okay Saturday. bleh.
Bakit kasi may pasok! Hahaha. So yeah. Soc Sci and Sci

So the bus picked me up... early for once. Haha.
Anyhow. He was driving like a mad-man! As in sobrang... woah. Makes me wonder if im insured. Hahaha. But we got there. Hahaha.

Anyhow, review group in 2C. And then yan na. Hahaha.

SOCIAL SCIENCE. It was easy, actually. There were a few questions nga lang that made me unsure pero okay naman siya. For this one, I left early. Haha.

SCIENCE. Grabe. Concepts! Half madali-half mahirap. Ung half, sure na sure ako sa mga sagot ko. Pero the other half sobrang HUH! Unexpected talaga. Hahaha! Dito naman, sinimot ko ang oras with an extra 15 mins for review. I left like 5 mins before the bell to be met by Carl who's also complaining about how hard it was.

So yeah. Dismissal. Weee.
Nilibre ako ni Sean ng Red Tea. Haha! Ride home.
Same mad-man driver. This time, I noticed the black gas coming from under the vehicle. WTF. If I don't die of being shuffled around the bus, I might die of global warming! HAHAHAHA! So yeah. Tsk-tsk-tsk. Hahaha.
Anyhow, I saw the full effects of his driving. So I was holding the Red Tea and then out of the blue, biglang tumalimsik iyong straw at nabasa ako ng iced tea na yon. Grabe naman. Haha!

When, I got home. Tulog... zzzz.
And then, tutor. Errands. Home. Weeeee.
By that time, I was feeling a bit grr na.

So yeah, at home, I asked our maid to open the last 2 boxes. Those being the ones that were left outside since there was no more space in Pasig.
To my surprise. EVERYTHING WAS GONE! Putsa, I hate those 2 floods. Nakakainis! Nasira lahat ng gamit ko. Mga pictures from the States, mga metallic small office supplies, ink pads (sorry, paul wala na) which spilled ink everywhere.. even on my hands which only got off after a few days ( i voted na for the elections. haha!) Communion candles and souveneirs, certificates, imported, revolving, one-of-a-kind star-gazing map, some shirts (buti na lang only a few were stained.), a lot of lalagyans. I'm just glad most of the containers are plastic so wash lang. Haha! And buti na lang my paint collection isn't affected. Phew! Hahaha. My bags, shirts and stuffed toys are safe naman. Hayz.

But that didn't make me go on a bad mood. In fact, nagpapatawa pa nga ako habang nagsasabi ng "Sayang! Bakit kasi nilagay doon," but still smiling ang laughing. Kay liit na bagay lang yan, why will i waste myself on just that? Hahaha. Memories can be built again.
So what made me go ballistic all the way?? (don't open if you don't wanna see the other side.)
YOU!
You're such an asshole noh. You aren't even man enough to take the blame for it.
"the past is the past. you can't do anything a--" BULLSHIT.
Pwede ba. You just can't say YOU'RE WRONG WRONG WRONG.
And then you're putting it all on me pa. Ako pa ang masungit. Ako pa ang madrama. Ako pa ang mali. Ako pa. Ako Ako Ako. Lagi na lang ako. Motherfucker ako na naman!
Pag may mali.. ako na lang!?! Pwede ba.. fuck the hell up already. It's only you.

Anyhow. If I wrote that last Saturday, that will be oober long na. Hahaha. Buti na lang I'm calm na ulit. :D So yeah. That's the start of a whole weekend going awry. Haha. Sleeeeep. Sleeeep.

.-.

Sunday. Mass....
AS usual, late na naman kami. Actually, I was finished in the bathroom quite early. Hahaha. Bumilis na kaya ang ELT (estimated ligo time) ko. Hahaha. from 30.. 20 na siya. Hahaha!
Pero we were still late kasi naba-bad trip pa rin ako. Pagod na pagod na pagod na akong pinagsasabihan. Naiinis lang kasi ako kaya kami na-late.

So yeah. Bad trip ako the whole time except when in Church. Sobrang gumaan buhay ko.. lalung-lalo na nung nag-communion. Galing kasi ng choir nila. Ang kaunti lang nila... mga 8 lang. Pero sobrang ganda ng tunog nila with all the harmony and stuff. Hahaha. Di gaya ng iba dyan. (2 lang ang pwede kong tamaan... alin kaya sa 2 ang tinatamaan ko?) It went all bad again during dismissal nung narinig ko ang salitang ALANGANIN.

Sobrang mpapasigaw na ako noon. ALANGANIN NA NAMAN!
Pwede ba?!? Sobrang overused ang paggamit ng salitang iyan. Nakakainis na.

So yeah. We went to Shang. By the time we were in Rustan's, I was so emo that I was about to have a breakdown right in the middle of the department store. I was already imagining myself shouting out there. I was feeling neglected na sobra. Parang. I dunno. CHILD ABUSE? hahaha.
Basta hindi ko na talaga ma-control ang sarili ko no'on.

Tapos we ate lunch sa fast food. Alam mo naman ako. Ayokong kumain doon simply because walang makain doon other than KFC. But they wanted to eat house of minis and how often do i actually have an urge for steak? Sa bahay lang. But they wanted to eat there... So i got the smallest meal in KFC so that mabilis akong matapos at may ma-guilty. (weird ko noh? pati ba naman yan piang-isipan?) Anyhow... it was delicious... I love their chicken mushroom steak which ironically isn't steak... just chicken fillet with mushroom gravy. Hahaha. stupid marketing propaganda. Hahaha!

Nag turnover lang ang day ko when we bought a trash can (for my room.. weee!) and nung kinidnap na ako nina Ate Kaye and Kuya. Hahaha! So yeah, I thought teaching her Math is one more problem in my life, pero it was not. Hahaha. madali lang.

So yeah. We went to Narra. I went to Mommy Fim's muna to get the broadband and tickle Alex for a bit. And then we started lessons. I plugged on to aaamath and then started following the lessons there. Teaching her is easy compared to teaching mommy fim how to use the pc... Dito, alam mong hindi madi-distract ang tinuturuan mo and hindi hopeless ang cause. HAHAHA!

So I taught her everything about fractions. Weee! Hahaha.
She got the lessons easy, but she got tamad to answer the questions on the pc. Hahaha. Kung anu-ano sinsagot sa 1/9 <,> or = 1/6. Hahaha! Sino ba naman ang hindi tatamarin? Hahaha!

Nagpadeliver din kami ng Yellow Cab habang tinatawanan ang The Buzz. Balita ba naman kasi: Boy Abunda: Inspiration ng Kokey... and News Reporter Gege Malalad: Nag-flying Kick Laban Sa Angas na Basketbolista, Basketbolista: Sinabunutan na Lang si Gege. Tapos, that basketbolista kept saying "Grets, sorry na" para daw silang close. Grets. Haha!

So yeah, when Alex and Robin were finally back home, I finished her reviewer and then played with Alex. And then I finally left in a good mood. Kahit na alam kong bad trip na naman ang bahay kung may nakita akong mukha. Hayz.

So life was generally okay. Haha. I studied for the QTs which were English and CLE which were generally easy to study.

.-.

The next day, QT! Hayz.

COMMUNICATION ARTS IN ENGLISH. Argh! Sobrang hirap. Story pa lang napa-syet na ako. I'm like ang deep grabe ng concepts tapos ang deep din ng vocabulary. Mahina pa naman ako sa compre. Hayz. So yeah. I couldn't find the last 2 SVA and the last Fragment/Run-on. I swear nothing was wrong or it was too subtle to be cared about. Hahaha. And my essay seemed so safe. Argh! I hated it. It was hard. Obviosuly, I was the last student to leave.. together with some H3 student..
By the time I was taking the CLE QT did I realize how much I should worry about the English. Hayz. Sobrang kinakabahan ako right now. I wasn't able to review and I was among the last who left. Pati ba naman ba this year napakahirap nito?

CHRISTIAN LIFE EDUCATION. This was quite easy as long as you memorized my notebook and are a true disciple of the Lord. Hehe. I'm just worrying I was being too general. But not so bad as compared to English. I had around 15 minutes of recess to spare.

So right after the QTs, I left home... same experience.
Went home. Dressed up. Rushed finishing the card.
So this time, binagalan ko ang pagdamit para may mainis dyan. HAHAHA! Ang evil kooo! Hahaha! At effective naman... may napasabi pa ng "The moment he arrived pa iyan!" Hahaha. Weeee. I'm so... Hayz.

So we went to Podium na.
It was my tita and tito's anniversary. Na-touch sila sa card... galing ko. Rushed yan. Dapat pala hindi ko pinag-iisipan ang mga sinusulat ko para hindi magmukhang "ito ang sinulat mo last year ah!" Hahaha!

So yeah, played with the bebies. Korean food wasn't so bad.. i loved the bulgogi. Hahaha.

And then they did some shopping. And then Starbucks.
Hahaha. Ang dami naming pinagawa sa mga barista. Nagkalito-lito na nga eh."Caffeinated, no whip cream, grande." "Decaf no whip cream tall" "Decaf with whipped cream tall" "Grande non-fat decaf with whipped cream" Blah. Hahaha! I got a Caramel Frappe.. like usual. The non-chocolatey Mocha Frappe. The coffee-based Caramel Cream. Hahaha. Nakakatamad kasi mag-Coffee Jelly. Hahaha! Next time I'll try the Akiga Cream... or whatever that was. (The Frappe made me puke.)

And then we went home. Hayz. Studied Math. I did all the quizzes again pausing between quiz 10 and 11 to take a nap. Snooze. Snooze. Snooze. Hahaha. I was having a hard time with the word problems and I had soooo much careless mistakes. Hahaha!

So I was listening to Hit again. Sobrang nakakatawa. Entertaining siya. Haha!
Sana maging title ung Angel and Demons. Hahaha!

.-.

Tuesday... last day na!!! Hahaha.

FILIPINO. Terrible. Promise, my corrections yan! waaa! I was so blank. Ang we-weird ng mga sagot ko sa panghalip! Hayz. Mahirap siya. Haha. Waaa! Everyone else agrees!

MATHEMATICS. I loved it. Easy. I was on my last number, 30 minutes pa. Hahaha. Anyhow, I didn't leave early kasi talagang ni-review ko ang lahat. Mamaya manghinyang ako sa carelessness. Anyhow, 2 multiple choice number and dikosure. Hahaha.

Pag-uwi, tulog agad. Mga 3:00 na ako nag-lunch.. Pancit Canton lang... sino ba kasi ang magaling na nagluto ng giniling gayong alam naman niyang nasusuka ako dun? Hayz. And now, I'm here. Hahaha. Ang I strated this around 3:30 and it's 6:30 na. Hahaha! Well, alam mo naman, mabilis ako madistract and makalimot. Haha.

Anyhow, I'll be teaching Ate Kaye soon. Hahaha. Here I go!

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terribly indelibly feasible

Bad Trip

*t: 7.25: 7.18 BEWARE! Contagious: Don't Stop the Music...

Well. Today turned out to be irritating.
It was as if the it was the best when I woke up.
I guess you can actually stop the music.

Hayz. I'm still trying to think... where did it start?
Maybe it was during confirmation practice.
We were singing out of timing.
But the piano was out of timing too.... and it could barely be heard.
And no one cared to even conduct. I mean... ??
Plus, they were singing like retards... sing-shouting just to make it louder.
Could the bad music have done it?

Then again, there's all this religious wars going into my head.
And I can't make it stop.

Well. It may also be how my seatmates are blabbering and ratting away.
I'm not the type who cares much if you're not singing in a mass/practice, but for some weird reason I could've hit them on the head with the misalette.
And they kept playing around and syit like that.

But maybe it's just because the MPC was extremely hot.

What really fueled me up was some pesky asshole in his PE uniform. I dunno if he's my batchmate or not. I didn't recognize his face.
I mean, I wasn't doing anything. I was just ordering a sandwich in the grade school canteen.
And he tells me off in a boastful way.
I mean... what did I do to you?
And strangely, I could've punched him... but I kept myself calm. You know me.....
Could've just been all the weariness today.
But that feeling was weird... although good. Maybe it would have released all the inner tension.
But I don't wanna go talk about violence coz i'm not that person... i hope.

And then.... they have to ruin my day some more at home.
I mean blaming things and making me do things all over the house.
And then more syet like this and that.

Anyhow, I've managed to almost finish Harry Potter. I'm on Chapter 34 na. I know.... cool... I don't think i read the other books this fast.

Hayz. Anyhow. There's some back-comment over there that I can't stand.
I just hope... ... ...
And I wish you see this...

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soy estupido

Bad Luck? Stupidity? some stuff

*T: 7.5: 6.37 BEWARE! Contagious: Quando and Infatuation...

Oki. Senti music. wahaha.

Well. Sheer stupidity.
And it all started during Science class. How unlucky.

Here's how it goes.
I take my experiment sheet out of my clear book since Mr. Quijano told us to add Sudan 4 to the procedure. And then he says pass the Homework sheet. So I pass it in the mess that is my table.

Then we head to the Science lab. I figured I'll leave my bag in the room since it was heavy, so I bring my pen, my clear book and the food to be experimented on.
FIRST BIG MISTAKE: Not bringing my bag. My experiment sheets aren't inside my clearbook. I took it out and it is now in the bag.

So I find out in the lab. So sure, by this time I'm thankful that Mrs.X isn't my teacher. (No offence, cher!) Why? She'd throw anger upon me and go ballistic. Magiging oober guilty ako nu'n.

So.. I head into the ODS. Got the key. Gave my ID. (warning! warning!) Somehow, I remember the face of the ID before me.
So I head to 2B. Stroke of bad luck! The key was faulty. WTF?! WHY ME!?! Anyhow, I inform Ms. Rocafort and return the key. She said she'll inform Mr Manahan once he's back from his lunch.

So okay. I don't have the sheet. But it's okay. Mr. Quijano lets us bring it home because we usually run out of time. (Another reason why I'm glad it's not Mrs.X) So he won't collect it. Phew.
So I worked by stealing Babsi's or Caloy's sheet. I made up for it by making my self oober busy. Hayz.

Anyhow. The day passes. And PE is there. Sadly, I forgot to wear rubber shoes, pero okay lang kasi my PE is swimming. Pero still... mukha akong yagit na naka-shorts at tshirt na may leather shoes.

Hayz. Anyhow, we were kinda late. Got shocked by the 15 lap skill test. Hayz.

Well. Gate 4.. the bus arrives. I was about to leave.... until.... until...
can u guess? *great and long pause* I lost my ID. I was so harassed. And syit like that. Where is it. Where is it. Where is it. Where is it.
So I leave without my ID. My name is listed... I don't want a green slip. Waaa! (Somehow, I won't feel guilty if this is the cause of my greenslip coz it's just loss of ID. It's not like I punched someone or insulted a teacher. But still... i don't want one.)

So when I get into the bus, frantic search pa rin. I gave up and just thought... where could it have fallen. Surely not during recess because I was counting my money and could clearly see my ID. So think... think... think.... It could have fallen out of my wallet while I was changing clothes for PE. HOW WONDERFUL! This means my dad would have something to sermon about. He perpetually hates the magic wallet because things may fall... and this ia added reason of hating it.

But I kept thinking. Until... I remembered a face. a face. a face. And it was clear to me. Can you guess how I lost my ID? *another long pause* Yes! You're right! I left it in the ODS. For fcuking sake. ARGH! I know. Me estupido.

.-.

Other than that, there's the case of the missing homework. Well, I print most of my homework, and put it in my file folders. I'M VERy SURE. They're there But they go missing! 3 HWS! Soc Sci's Buddhism and Hinduism, and Filipino's talata. WHY ME? Hayz.

.-.

You may have noticed. I never typed Haha. I was proofreading (for the first time) and I noticed it too.

.-.

Well. I'm thankful I saw Obie's line.

The Chocolate War is set in Massachusetts and not in England. So bye-bye British accent.

I've been having problems because of this. Over the summer, I tried perfect pronunciation leading to me sounding like a half-American person. And somehow, the British accent I used to be able to perform disappeared.

I mean it got lost... I was able to say my whole grade seven oral piece in a non-intentional British accent. Ironically, the poem's name was I am a Filipino. (by Carlos Romulo)

Sadly, my American accent is bulol. So I don't expect much there.

(But hey, I still have the a-accent, the Soph Prof accent and the new yet-unnamed accent.)

.-.

I can't wait. After FX next week, it's HARRY POTTER!

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Privacy

*S: 3.18: 11.24 BEWARE! Contagious: One Night Only...

I wasn't intending on blogging right now. Actually, I was in the middle of doing my project. BUT really. People just have to snoop on you. It annoys me SOOOO much. That's why I want to move this computer to the other room... where I will be left alone. It just annoys me so much. I mean.
AGH!
How I wish. I mean... I already old'em to go away. But really wants to look at what I'm doing. I mean. Okay. Cooling down. Cooling down. Cooling.

It's a good thing I have enough self-control to not black this. I mean. Release of steam. I NEED CHOCOLATE! This isn't easy. Chocolate's comfort food. Hayz.
Oh well. I'll be off to put this memory in the box and continue my project. Haaaa. I think I'm doing better. Easy. Easy. Ahhh.

Duwa and FX... last notes

Wow.
FX forever! I hope this entry isn’t as discouraging as it is long—very long. Pang-FWA na!

On a more serious note, I really love Stage FX. It’s really fulfilling that, after all those practices, we had a successful show. Although not perfect, it was close enough. I am really glad that I decided to join this club.

After all the days of practice, especially those that reached 10:30+pm, I can say everything was paid off fully. Even though it brought a lot of stress, depression, failure and all other things found in Pandora’s Box, I still can say that I couldn’t have survived without Stage FX.

School, high school for that matter, is really stressful. Everyday, there’s homework; every week, there’s a new deadline. Oral test this, portfolio that, ORR this, creative synthesis there, AA here. The work just keeps piling up together with all those other personal problems brought up by teenage angst. I guess the year would have been a waste if it wasn’t for FX—and my friends, too.

Duwa is definitely something I am very, very proud of. Not in a way wherein newspapers need to write a review talking about how it’s like no other theatre show, but in a way that it has helped me grown as a person. (Quite hard to understand? I know I’m not making sense, just pretend.) I mean, it’s taught me a lot about life; its variety. How you have to strive hard to achieve something great. How each detail is important because the jigsaw puzzle wouldn’t be as lovely in the end if we didn’t put up with each piece. How each struggle brings the best in each and every one of us.

FX has made me do things unbelievable and unimaginable. At first, I thought it would be just like the grade school’s X-Rep; only, it would have actual presentations, but by the first day itself, it proved to be a challenge. Even if I fell face-flat on the lecture hall ramp while vocalizing and running around with my hands up, I kept running. Even if it ended later than usual, I was fine. Even if I barely new the members and I wasn’t really close to those I know, I stood up.

FX helped made me face a different kind of rejection-acceptance experience. Who knew I’d end up speaking better Filipino because of it? (Well, better than before at least. I am proud to admit I still have an English mix to my Tagalog) Who knew you could get a kissing scene—one not ideal, one that’s fake, one I still don’t want to be reminded of because of what might have happened in the end (please don’t remind me, hehe), aren’t you glad it was removed?—in your first audition? Who knew I would actually curse—in Filipino? (Who knew people don’t know I don’t curse in English?) Who knew? Who knew?

Yes, to those who are out of the group, I auditioned for the role of Andres Gorospe in Condemned. I, instead, was forced to do an excerpt of Kristiyano in Hulugan. Up to this day, I don’t know why I got that role since I was, as they say, out of character and barok in Tagalog, but I am very proud that I was chosen to do Kristiyano. It was definitely more than what I bargained for. It was more challenging than any other role that could have been offered—or forced—unto me.

This drama club helped me become open to suggestion, criticism and change. I still remember those days that I would say Jesus and putang ina. Instead of the oh so Filipino-rich accent, I would say Jeses and not Jesoos. Or maybe the times I would say “p-p-p-putang ina”? Laugh with me all you want, but I can’t deny it.

I’d remember our first gig during the talent drive, and I’d still wonder how much worse I was then compared to now. I’d remember the extra Saturday practices we had before that. I remember the times Jerrick, CY, Perez and I would try out the most obscene, awkward, uncomfortable, hilarious, heat-capturing, space-consuming positions as practice for blocking and levels. I’d remember how I’d die and how my bones were about to break, and that one time I already couldn’t breathe. Resilience. I stood strong. We stood strong. We survived.

I remember those workshop moments. The breathing exercises, the paint-a-moving picture, the spotlight. Hilarious as it is, it also helped us improve our talents and lessened the stress we were carrying. Laughs and enjoyment aren’t harmful. I remember how much KFC we’ve been eating. Yum.

FX night. That was definitely a memory. I wouldn’t have missed it for the world. Although it was a night of serious practice, it was surely very fun. It made our FX family’s bond stronger. Rolling down the lecture hall, secret trips ;), fighting over the shower, leaving people in the shower with the lights off, Moulin Rouge, ghosts, dancing, remedial Math class, etc. That was a night.

And the practices. Who could forget? Those nights were as tiring as hell. The last time I had so much stress was during the Choral Recitation. Although, that was different. Then, the frustration was pointless because I’d walk up the next day to experience déjà vu. Kim, is your butt heavy? Who meowed? Do you love each other? WESTON! KARL! BENJAMIN! Karl, is the world beautiful? Those wretched memories. Stage FX was different. After a moment of purgation of emotion—deep emotion at that,—we suddenly grew better. Practice was more exciting. We lived every moment of it. And we went home at a late time. (It’s a good thing there wasn’t much homework.)

The next day: The play-date! No one would know how much stress and nervousness we were feeling. We were running very late; the crowd was restless. As I slowly opened the curtains, the oxygen was running low. The heart beats. Tugdug. Tugdug.

I couldn’t distinguish the jeers from the applauds. Was there something wrong with me? I guess stage fright got to me. I committed a lot of mistakes during the dance sequences. Not to mention how poorly I did during Hulugan. I couldn’t even be heard. (Up to now, I can’t even finish watching the video clips taken from those days.)

I wasn’t down and out or anything, just quite embarrassesd. Who wouldn’t? I guess what kept me up were the great comments (especially from the unexpected) and the great support of the FX family.

The next day was prime. It was exciting and I enjoyed it very much. I didn’t commit any more mistakes during the dance sequences. I don’t know about my volume, but I think—I THINK—it was better. Overall, it was great! Who knew you would be mobbed by comments from other people once you get out? And of course, the pictures! It was really great.

FX for life. At this point, I want to quote Stacey. “FX isn’t a group; it’s a family.” And I’m very proud to be part of that family. Thank you, SanLu, mister director, for all the guidance and dealing with my very amateur acting skills. Thank you, Perez, CY and Jerrick, for dealing with me. (No thanks given to those times when I was dead and… ehem.) Thank you, Kim, Mark and Christian, for being really close and approachable during the meetings. Thank you, Stacey, for teaching me the lights. (?!) Thank you, Mr. Legaspi, for being such a great moderator and mentor. Thank you, Ms. Lampa, for being really approachable and close to me even if we’ve only met each other during these times. Thank you, Ms. Yao, for all the fun and laughs, and the time inside the restricted areas. Hehehe. Thank you, Gng. Enaje, for helping me improve our acting. (Sorry for crying on you makeup, too.) Thank you, everyone! I may have not mentioned your names, but all of you have been very dear to me.

I love this family.

"FX isn't a group; it's a family!"

Wow. That was long! Really! Three MS Word pages! Parang aalis na ako. Haha. Farewell, everyone! But seriously, everything from above comes from my heart, black, bloody and imperfect as it is.

S*: 3.3: 10.18 BEWARE! Contagious: Duwa... See, it's so formal, binaba ko toh. Hahaha!

Kung Hei Fat Choy

*S: 2.18: 5.46 BEWARE! Contagious: marami...

恭喜發財!
新年快樂!

Kung Hei Fat Choy!
Gong Xi Fa Cai!
Kiong Hee Huat Chai!
Xin Nian Kuai Le!
Happy Chinese New Year!
Happy Spring Festival!
Happy Lunar New Year!

Hehehe.... Galing Chinese school... wala lang... That doens't make sense... HEHE! Thanks to Paul for the words... whatever html u did... Haha.

In the meantime, here are the class/akwe pix:







Well, today was kinda bad trip kaya yokong pag-usapan. Let's just sau i made my problms box na... HAHAHA!

Bad Trip and Other Sh*t

*S: 12.17: 2.41 BEWARE! Contagious: Piano in the Dark and some Christmas songs... 8 days till Christmas

Hayz.
I hate Sundays. Not becuase of Mass... actually, that's my only consolation. It makes me feel better.
I hate it grabe. Exactly when I wake up, there has to be some kind of mess I have to put up with. It makes my day sour. My voice is scratchy and I have colds again. Not to mention the sudden memories of hatred and all other such atrocities.

Grabe.
Sometimes you just won't feel it.
And no matter what you do, everything backfires.
And sometimes you'd think you'd trust people and they'd trust you. But of course not, they'd rather believe the less reliable source. Say that I'm lying. I'm just so pissed at it. I mean. F^CK it. Why them? Am I not honest? Is that it? Sometimes, you'd jsut wish you were elsewhere. You wouldn't really feel it. And I hate it so much.

Don't try making sense of this. You just won't understand.

Tired as...

T*: 12.5: 7.27 i.ve got Volume5... what's in your head? 23 days till Christmas

Olryt.
Hayz. Kay ... buhay.

Hmm.
Before any troubles come this way, I'd better tell you 'bout the...
The ASSEMBLY. Daming awards! Congrats sa lahat!
GAWAD ULIRAN was very unexpected. We got Silver on the 3 awards. Sayang 'yung discipline. **FP: Aww Ma~an!**
Grabe! I wanted 1A to win sa eXtreme Makeover. Shucks. I wanted those TV-integrated-whiteboards. **FP: Aww Ma~an!**
I'll go quote this from CJ's blog. He copied Fr. Go's exact words: (?!)

"Now since we didn't have any classes due to the recent typhoon, we were thinking of whether or not we should still consider this Friday as a holiday, but since it is a very special year for Xavier we thought what the heck lets just make it a holiday"

Yebah!!!
Hehe. We really have to catch-up on a lot of stuff. BUT WHO CARES?!?! NO SCHOOL!!!

Oh.
Music really is soothing to the soul. Hindi na ako gaano kapagod kaysa sa kanina. Haha. Sana lang may laughter. Soothe the soul and have the best medicine **FP: Aww Ma~an!**

I.
I NEED TO DO BETTER IN MATH. I just got some realizations last Sunday, and it requires doing better in Math. Grabe. May quiz average is 84%. I need to make it higher. (Reminds me of that Science quiz. T.T)

And op kors!
IC. You surprise me day-by-day. Ugh. How many times do I have to remind you on what you're supposed to do??
From a 5... u'r down to a 2.3 over 10.
Grabe ba naman kayo.
I was planning on joining you na on stage, tapos hindi pa pala. At grabe ang roar n'yo! Wow. BILIB NA BILIB AKO SA INYO. :| *rolls eyes*
I was just being lenient during English class. But I wanted to explode during dismissal practice. BA NAMAN?!?! I wish Ms. Afuang left earlier, so that you could have had it na. ANd I also wished my sundo ako that day, so the bus won't wait. We would have stayed till 7... and not get any better. LET's FACE IT. You need a better director.

Frankly

*T: 11.30: 1.42 i.ve got Ain't No Mountain High Enough by the Australian Idol Finalists... what's in your head?

I'm so sick and tired of being, literally, tired and sick... and DON'T COMPLAIN 'coz, frankly, I DON'T CARE

Well...
The Field Trip was all good. No complaints. What got to my head was the practice and the cab-hunting. Especially those people who left and that cab driver that declined.

Right now, my mood is swinging. I'm mostly contented with having no classes and having such a long sleep. From 8pm-11.30am. But my mood isn't all that well. Especially if you remind me about anything related to the Chorals. I'll jsut be more pissed. Thanks to CJ, Paul and Zyg. Through their IMs and thair blogs, myhead sort of heated. Not your fault though.

I better release the steam before it explodes... silently or violently.

Well...
After the field trip, one we set foot on the school grounds, I gathered them, and we went to the tennis court. Some followed right away, again, some had VERY, VERY, VERY slow feet. And of course, as always, one would have to escape.

Now...
The practice was both torture and entertaining. Torture? In the bus I had a throbbing headache. I tried to sleep, but someone--let's hide him under the name Kim--really didn't allow me, and, as always, put me to my cranky level. Something that always happens to me when I'm woken up. Now, it would almost reach anger level, but I kept calm. Now, that headache didn't stop. And throughout the practice I felt nauseated. Adding to that, my already sore voice. I could barely speak right, but of course, no one would listen; therefore, I had to shout. and shout. and shout. So much, that, when I got home, I was practically voice-less. I couldn't speak.

Entertainment?
Ha-ha. (in that evil voice) Of course, I had to relieve myself. Each time I saw one tiny msitake, I'd make them repeat everything. A single scratch? Talking? Standing crookedly? Holding the folder wrong-ly? AGAIN! Ha-ha. I don't give a damn how tired you are, we'll keep repeating. Ha-ha. I drove a lot of people to the wall. And of course, they'd keep blaming the name I called. Bwahahahaha.

Basically, from a 6 I'm putting their score down to a 5.
Just for their information, those who left early are marked absent. I would name them, but what's the point? And even if there wasn't gonna be any classes on the next day, I didn't care. We finished at around 5:13. I'm not sure about what time the last person left.

Oki...
So I hydrated myself and left. We walked oh so far and found no taxi at all. Losing hope. Then there was this taxi, only the other girl took it. And then there was this other taxi. Ugly fucker. Didn't wanna go to Crame. It just disgusted me. We ended up walking to Petron and taking a jeep there.

Well.
I ate dinner and fell asleep. I woke upa t 1 to change clotehs and went back to sleep. Mighty good was it, too. Well. I'm configuring my XP Theme. B2W

Sour to Sourer to Sweet

S*: 11.11: 11.15 i.ve got Lying... by Panic! at the Disco, More to Life by Stacie Oricco and More than Words by Frankie J... what's in your head?

So testosterone boys and harlequin girls...

Hmmm.
Life. A roller coaster. A wheel. A DSL connection (particularly mine).
It has its high point and its low points. Today was just one day that showcases both.

The day state ravenously. I woke up 8ish to get ready for tutor. Apparently, in my life, 7 hours of sleep isn't enough after all the days of puyat and pagod. *Sigh* Breakfast wasn't as filling. I hate Gardenia bread. I like other brands. Gardenia's bread is rough on the throat. Well, life can't get crueler, can it? Aside from my unusual bathroom rituals (featuring Phantom of the Opera), I was already late for tutor. Add to that, my yaya, who was supposed to get a cab, didn't get a cab, instead did some kalye babad. Of course, I have a low boiling point. DIFUSE. I arrived in tutor. The day was plum. We left.

Now, once i arrived home, I was in deep slumber. ZzZzZ. zZzZz. ZzZzZ. WAH! I woke up with a blast, wherein "with a blast," here, means suddenly, rampantly and violently. Of course, no matter how good my sleep was, I would get a headache. I don't like to wake up through the method of being surprised. I get headaches. And of course, add to the headache my boiling blood. I ate lunch at 2ish. Did some more sleeping and woke up 3ish for Yamaha. I went to my organ lessons and practiced Taboo over and over, and over, and over, and over again! Of course, my sore midle finger and aching back wasn't what brought my anxiety. IT WAS STRESS. STRESS. STRESS. STRESS. I've been getting a lot of mistakes on the stuff I didn't have mistakes at before. STRESS. The audition-elimination for the Grand Recital is tomorrow. STRESS. What if i did in the audition what i did in the practice today. STRESS. What failure will be compared to me. STRESS. What if i do pass? STRESS. I've never been in front of a big crowd all alone. Usually small crowds or with someone else or both. STRESS. And, most of all, WHY DOES I HAVE TO BE ALL ON DECEMBER 9. STRESS and ANXIETY. Blurb. I went home hearing the voice of my disrespectful maid, the pessimistic taxi driver and the annoying voice of my other yaya's child. Consciously, i'm thinking about the environment. Sub-consciously, I carried worries and stress. ANXIETY and STRESS.

It's not yet even five [o'clock], and i'm already tired and ready to give up.

How Kim's worries made me feel good? Not an irony. Kim's worries weren't my fault; therefore, i have lost all guilt i carried during Friday. Once i got home, I went online to do my homework. But, because of STRESS and ANXIETY, i decided to chat. Luckily, Kim was online. So i was able to say what i wanted to say. Before i was able to start with homework, i had to leave already. Apparently, my dad had arrived, adn he planned to go over to CJ's since i told him i had to pick up the Narnia DVD. I told him he wasn't home yet, so we went to National. Riding the car took away some of my worries, which were lightened when I was talking to Kim, because I wasn't commuting anymore. Although, a mechanice stench wreaks havoc in the car. YWEEE... I bought 2 calligraphy brushes/mopi(t)--small and big,--a calligraphy pen and some ink. (Maybe I should have bought the India ink. whatever.) Sadly, they had no calligraphy paper in both Greenhills branches. (If worse come to worst, we're going to Ongpin... my first time. Hihi...) Since CJ still wasn't home, we spent more time in National. Now, i'm on the search for a grammar book about conjuntions instead of Filipino dictionaries. But I'm still on the lookout for good dictionaries. While looking around for the Noli comic--which i wasn't able to find,--i saw a book antagonizing the Da Vinci Code--which i read, of course, it's sad that the Da Vinci Code itself can't be read in National. When i turned around to look at the opposing shelf, I saw the Da Vinci Code and other Catholic-antagonistic books. HAHA! IRONIC! We ate dinner in Delifrance, then we left for CJ's house and got Narnia. By this time, all stress and anxiety has gone... although it still haunts me.

Right now, I'm doing homework. And it's best that I start concentrating. GNGN

Just Another Bad Day

10.8: 3.06 i.ve got Real and J.Lo's Rebirth Album... what's in your head?

Hayy...
What another bad day!?! I dunno if it's just me... I just hate it! The contentment that was Saturday was overpowered by this worst day ever!!! And it's all just because of one person... if you'll veer be able to find the site, I just had a another BLACK moment... HAHA!.. That was just my fifth post on theat blog, which shows i don't get mad right away... but when I do, ayokong may makakita... I can still remember that group practice in grade4... The only person I can remember who was a victim of all my f^cking hatred on that dreaded group... HAHAHAHA!

Oh well..
I'll just continue on about my weekend... Friday was okay... I had around 2 naps... hehehe... Well, the food at tutor's was good... As expected, there was mooncake... I also had some cool cookies... Imagine a Fig Newton... Make it circle shaped... change the filling from the gooey thing into chocolate chips... HEAVEN! HAHAHA!!

Well...
Yamaha was in the afternoon... We went back to Taboo, one of my most favorite songs to play... It might be my audition piece for whatever grand recital he's talking about.... haha!

After...
We went to National, I bought some stuff... and I finally found a decent English-Filipino Dicitionary... I wanted the other one, but what I bought was much more handy, so I got it... Besides, it was much cheaper... HAHA! Well, we went to the grocery after and bought some stuff... Then, I did homewrok from 8:30pm to 12:30mn... Hahaha! Well.. gngn.. gtg do hw.. :-)